The New York Times A district attorney in Pennsylvania hit back at attempts by Bill Cosby’s legal team to drop criminal charges against the entertainer.
I have The Pain which accompanies living in a world where injustices are perpetrated upon those considered worth marginalising, or considered lesser. Myself - as a HUGE Fan of “The Cosby Show”; as a survivor of sexual assault; & as an extremely VOCAL & impassioned activist for civil rights (and the destruction of ALL that is rampant re: systemic racism/biases/covert & overt INJUSTICES against those of whom these systems and injustices are are so casually and sickeningly perpetrated DAILY in almost every corner of our blue, innocent, and tortured planet) - I'm TORN and BEREFT.
This whole media circus and the AWFUL and SIMILAR allegations, AND the horrific opinions regarding both the alleged Perpetrator - Bill Cosby - and Also the Horrific Opinions regarding the Plaintiffs/Alleged Victims too.
I think the media pronouncing him guilty before any trial was Freaking Nauseating.
I also think that there are a LOT of women alleging that he did this, and have also done so for years now, and were summarily dismissed, which is ALSO nauseating.
As a Woman, I also know that I used to be a young girl who was Definitely NEVER given an ounce of credence for anything which so tragically and life-alteringly occurred to me, to the point where I internalised an important and very sad lesson - that the system is there to protect CERTAIN people, but Not ALL People, and it’s not Justice for ALL, but for SOME.
I can only remotely imagine how awful it must have felt to have to bring charges up against America’s “Dad”, and to know that - had he been just ANY guy? There STILL wouldn’t have been a whole lot of attention given to the allegations. After all - the Rape Stats and their REALITY WHICH EXISTS despite common popular opinion and perspective are in direct opposition TO the common perspective, as is frequently the case with a highly brainwashed & sometimes “dumbed-down” society - one which is too sadly and desperately ensnared in the woman and sex hatred which accompanies the puritanical entanglement of our predecessors.
The Statistically Supported and REALISTIC TRUTH ABOUT THE CRIME OF RAPE?
- Rape is a vicious Crime of Hatred and the Induction of Suffering and Pain.
- It’s a sick compulsion - born of a sense of entitlement combined with an acute lack of empathy for others, and occasionally occurring due to the opportunity to be able to commit rape (however the “opportunity” will either present organically, or BECAUSE the potential or actual rapist will eventually arrange for such an “opportunity” to present itself, so intense is their desire and compulsion to commit rape) - to humiliate, harm, subjugate, and exert control over another through no fault of their own, but rather due to the perpetrator’s own perception of the person they choose to rape; whether due to their feeling mocked, rejected, or even viewing the person they intend to rape or have raped as a proxy for someone they hate from another separate situation, such as a relative or parent they feel someone wronged by, or even someone who once realistically or only perceptually bullied/hurt/humiliated them in an earlier part of their life.
- It has little to NOTHING to do with Sex or Desire.
- Women and Men of ANY AGE Can Be and ARE RAPED. Although Women do report being raped more often than their Male counterparts (and due to the lack of credence and understanding given to the nature of rape, this number is far lower than the number of rapes ACTUALLY committed),, the number of Men who are also raped (Primarily by other Men, but also by Women too) is quite a bit higher than one might expect, and this also removes the silliness behind the idea that rape occurs because of women being “teases” or wearing “immodest” clothing & somehow “inviting” it; after all, Men in Western culture aren’t so closely associated with being creatures viewed primarily through the filter of sexuality, but rather, they’re far more often defined by their actions and vocations prior to their somehow being creatures tied up inextricably with either being innocent virgins, wives, mothers, or desireable/wanton, or frigid and unable to acquire the ultimately societally-induced “reward” - a man who will have them to marry.
- VERY sadly, Men report rape even less than Women do, as it’s viewed incorrectly as being something that only happens to women or someone weak; furthermore, it’s seen as something to be almost impossible for a Man to be made to endure and be forced to suffer, and viewed to happen so much more infrequently than it actually does that there are FAR FEWER AVAILABLE SERVICES Available and Offered to Male victims of rape However, luckily there are so many efforts nowadays to make Male Rape known that this IS changing for the better.
- BABIES and Young Children are ALSO Raped.
- RAPE IS a common and highly MISUNDERSTOOD crime of rage and hate.
- It is ALSO often life-shattering - sometimes immediately, or years later, and often PERMANENTLY.
- The response of a Victim/Survivor of Rape runs the gamut:
- dissociation
- denial
- protecting the perpetrator (see ⦿Acquaintance Rapes &/Or Date Rapes Below↓)
- self-blame
- self-shame
- confusion
- terror
- a loss of emotion altogether
- depression
- acting out
- promiscuity
- self-hatred
- self-harming
- suicidal-ideations and attempts
- a nervous breakdown of sorts, either shortly thereafter, or many years later-quite out of the blue.
- Contrary again to popular belief, the Rapist in the Bushes/Breaking in and Raping someone by Knife/Gun Point, whilst it does occur, occurs the LEAST of all Rapes. The VAST MAJORITY are ⦿Acquaintance Rapes &/Or Date Rapes, and this in and of itself creates an entire separate set of problems and self-blame issues when one decides if it’s worth it to report and prosecute. When one “knows“ someone? They often feel another SEPARATE host of feelings upon the instigation and/or conclusion of having been raped by someone previously safe and/or hitherto innocuous in their life:
- Confusion
- Disbelief
- Second-guessing oneself ie.a fear of MISTAKING the experience of currently BEING RAPED by this PERSON who they were so SURE that they truly KNEW (and still think that they MUST know despite this same person suddenly being the person who’s currently raping them, nonetheless) for perhaps a gross misunderstanding - what signal must they have inadvertently given to indicate that they wished to have sex? At first, the shock of being raped by someone trusted and known is STILL being processed and therefore one is clinging to the thought of what’s happening as a “mistake” on the part of their friend. To truly accept that one’s being raped is just too foreign re: this trusted person who’s suddenly begun to rape. They simply must have indicated they wanted to have sex cos this person they’ve known and trusted isn’t a rapist, right? Therefore there’s the fear that if one REALLY begins to fight and the “friend” doesn’t stop, the situation goes from a desperately confusing and unwelcome act that one can simply ignore to A RAPE - an act that JUST MIGHT NOT STOP despite trying even harder to make sure that it does so; the fear that the act one’s currently experiencing may even wind up being something far more painful, invasive, terrifying, shocking, and disgusting IF the Victim of such an act should make the conscious choice to actually address for what it is. A fear of saying its name, almost - the Voldemort of horrible situations one can find themselves experiencing despite never intending to nor expecting to.
- A fear of insulting the rapist, or hurting their feelings by accusing them of raping them. They can very well say, “I’m not raping you - I really thought you wished to have sex, and I’m so hurt that you think I’m a rapist!”
- A shock which blurs out the reality, and can often render one as incapable of fighting as being anesthetized
- Furthermore, a fear of fighting so hard that someone else IS actually alerted - hence, seeing this person that they’ve ALSO known for sometime and likely think of as a good person - as a RAPIST. It’s a crime that we ALL know is a horrific thing to experience and to do to someone, and to call someone a rapist without good reason is absolutely TERRIBLE and can destroy this person’s life, so if one is fearful that they aren’t actually being raped despite the fact that they actually ARE? It’s a highly troubling state to find oneself in, cos one’s brain goes to a million different places when one is being raped by someone they both knew and trusted, and often one knows their family too, their kind parents who definitely shouldn’t be made to deal with such a thing, and their children! and YIKES this is going to ruin his relationship with his Wife!! Oh no, I can’t do that to them!
- YES the above mental gymnastics and cognition glitches are VERY REAL and INCREDIBLY COMMON thoughts which run through the head of nearly every person who has been raped by someone they thought they knew.
- False rape allegations do occur, BUT THEY ARE incredibly RARE!!
Society’s frequently embraced & perpetuated beliefs RE: The Crime of RAPE (℅ Media, Religion, & Pop-Culture)?
- Rape is often something which happens to women.
- A Women who “gets herself raped” is frequently a stupid WOMAN
- A woman’s ignorance and foolishness is unfortunately but correctly & righteously punishable by her being raped.
- It’s her own fault (“asking for it”) for
- using poor judgment
- choosing to wear clothing which could be construed as the clothing worn by a sexually eager woman
- behaviour which implies one wishes to have sex with absolutely anyone
- which could imply smoking cigarettes, wearing makeup, dancing, singing, walking, or anything deemed to be a way to blame a woman for the act perpetrated upon her
- using alcohol/drugs
- or even any breaking of any law ie. Well, if you don’t want “X” to happen, I guess you shouldn’t do “Y”
- *Obviously this mindset is devoid of an iota of sense, let alone any regard for the myriad socio/neuro/anthro/economical factors involved in using substances, &/or breaking the law with a minor violation - particularly minor, as nothing short of a felony indicates any sort of horrific and unalterable character flaw which merits such a harsh penalty as a sexual assault, and depending upon the felony, I believe there’s a justice system in place which, although heavily flawed, doesn’t encompass Rape as ANY of the punishments meted out by a Judge & Jury of one’s peers*
- associating with the wrong sort of people
- being in the wrong place
- breaking some sort of social more
- breaking rules set by her parents
- *Anything else that one can construe as blameworthy depending upon one’s culture, but not entirely so, as frequently one often will grasp for any reason to blame THE VICTIM in the instance of a sexual assault - for what reason, I’m simply not entirely sure. It’s highly infrequent for one to say, “Well of course your house was robbed! Look at how enticing your curtains and aluminum siding was set up. Your house was asking for it!”, and it’s a crime - vicious, and so violating and vile and terrifying, and can result in pregnancy and even mortal wounds and diseases, as well as it being something which can destroy the rest of one’s life without proper kindness, intervention, and aftercare - that nonetheless is treated so bizarrely and backwards by our society - I never see someone who’s been mugged facing the same reprisals and lack of belief in their stories, nor someone who’s been robbed at gunpoint. And being RAPED is BEING ROBBED - robbed of the feeling of safety one may have entertained previously but can no longer feel, and robbed of the Autonomy over one’s own BODY; one’s RIGHTS to WISH TO NOT BE ENTERED & INJURED & VIOLATED, and for such autonomy? For the “Audacity” to wish for others to comply to the RIGHT to Bodily AUTONOMY and the FREEDOM of Existing unMOLESTED and UNTOUCHED, of Being UTTERLY INVALIDATED because someone else SUBJUGATES YOU and decides that YOU are not a person with rights and feelings, but rather a commodity to be taken and stolen and hurt? There is a steep price, and that’s the price of judgment and disbelief and hatred for even HAVING a body which was RAPE-ABLE, and objecting enough to such that one would even wish to seek prosecution and thus “hurt” the Rapist and their Family by prosecuting them, despite THE RAPIST being the ACTUAL one who committed an act so heinous that they NEEDED to be prosecuted - that THEY were the ones who hurt their own family by merit of committing the act of rape.*
- Rape can’t happen to a woman who is cautious, uses and knows self-defense, dresses modestly, goes to church, doesn’t drink, doesn’t go out alone at night, behaves, obeys her parents, doesn’t send out the “wrong” message, isn’t perceived as “easy” or “loose”, etc…
- Rape doesn’t and can’t happen to women like “US’/”ME” cos “WE’D”/”I’D” NEVER make a silly error in judgment (The *Hindsight Fallacy”).
- Often Women just *CRY RAPE
- cos they regret sleeping with someone the night before upon waking up the next day
- because they wish to take revenge upon someone for scorning them.
- because they need a father to pin their baby on that they’ve already conceived with another man/men cos of being a “whore” who’s unable to keep track of who she’s slept with
- *The mere thought that *CRYING RAPE* is an easy solution for a woman to choose to do in order to obtain a father and thus bear a “legitimate” child, punish a man who scorned her, or as a way of saving face after regretting one’s actions the night before is such a ludicrous idea , insofar as such people who see this as a real and common thing obviously don’t realise the scrutiny and disbelief which accompanies ALL victims of Rape - Male and Female alike. The scrutiny is so incredibly strong that many men and women just don’t bother pursuing charges at all - it’s a pretty hard crime to prove, and is wrongly perceived as a reflection of the victim rather than of the perpetrator.
- *To tell someone you’ve been raped is to face a crowd of many people who will secretly wonder what YOU did to cause it. That doesn’t sound like a very good way to get revenge against anyone to ME.)
To allege that someone who is incredibly FAMOUS, WEALTHY, BELOVED, and had GENERATIONS of of FANS - DEVOTED! - PLUS a Squeaky-Clean “FAMILY-FRIENDLY” image? That must be the most difficult thing amongst many difficult things one must endure in a life filled with so many trials, as is the law of the human condition.
I was and AM a HUGE The Cosby Show fan, and it's making my stomach hurt to think that America's dad may have done this.
I think it comes down to - re: the social viewpoint on the Prejudging of Bill Cosby as Guilty before a Trial - the thinking and Systems RE: who is oppressed the Most? Ultimately, re: Legalities - who gets the least fair Treatment?
Is it White or Black Women, or White or Black Men, and is their Wealth and Fame a Factor?
Most of all, will a Fair Trial be provided, and if so, will the conclusions and denouement of said trial be to the satisfaction of all parties involved?
Will the Opinions of the People and the Media be quelled by something that winds up - despite a deeply flawed legal system - shockingly fair for once, if this does wind up being the case?
The only options - Guilty or Innocent - are neither appetising nor happy.
If he’s Guilty? Like, Undeniably so? It’s akin to admitting that we - fans for years - had been fooled by him. Someone we all held in high esteem.
I HOPE he didn’t cos !. I don’t want those women to have gone through the horrors of a sexual assault, and 2. I don’t want Bill Cosby to BE guilty of something which I hate the thought of him having done.
Deep down, I can see how it definitely could have happened despite my wishing otherwise.
Only cos Rich People sure seem to behave as entitled as F***.
I hope he’s innocent though…
xoxo
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